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Warning: The following entry may upset you, it may offend as well…but you know I am not perfect and I can’t please everyone.  I am tired of always bowing to everyone else s opinions just because I am the “nice Christian” does not mean I have to agree, or sit quietly and say nothing. I am to be a cultivator of peace but most of the anti-God people I know out there do not have peace on their tongues or in their hearts when they are wielding them at me. I can’t sit by and say nothing, I have to be ready with a response for why I believe what I believe. I am passionate about Christ, I know the power of this transformed life and I don’t want anyone else to miss it. I have written the following not because I want to hurt or offend but because I feel like many people need to hear what I believe is becoming a growing epidemic of hard hearts and shut ears. People are so biased against God that when the subject is broached they have already written me off! As if the very God of creation did anything to offend them? He meticulously wove them in their mothers wombs, and died on the cross just so He could know them in a more intimate way. The desire is not one sided either, so many people talk about feeling empty, they try and fill their hearts, minds, and souls but nothing seems to satisfy. I know I have the answer…Jesus. He will perfectly fit that whole..you want to know why? Because it was a God shaped void…I am not saying that if you accept the gift of salvation and start developing a relationship with God that everything will be better…but at least you wont be alone…and eventually it will get better. God loves you too much to leave you in the mess, and He created you and purposed you for so much more…. that’s why you have so many gifts and talents. I pray that you will read this and rather than be offended your heart will be pricked and you will decide to get to know the God of your salvation…Immanuel: God with us, that’s Jesus.

You ask for proof!

Your own demise is written in your eyes,

void, as they are of truth.

Why can’t you see that if you would just look

with eyes that wanted to see

then proof…

well you would find it.

Instead you demand proof

but refuse to see

because you have already decided.

You have a disposition that is set against,

a bias if you will,

like a child,

who seeing but not knowing,

refuses to even try it!

Your staggering intellect has made you dumb.

For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing,

but to us who are being saved

it is the very power of God.

You want proof then here is some.

Diggers dig

and find in the ground

ancient kingdoms

whose histories are found within the scripture.

If historians

and scientists

recognize the Bible as a reliable source of history

don’t you think that makes it a little bit more trustworthy?

A standard test

to determine the authenticity and trustworthiness of books

found from earlier periods of time

is to test them against other copies of the same text,

and also to see how many copies of the same text are available.

For example:

If I had a copy of Homers Iliad

I could compare it to only a few of its other copies to prove that it was indeed a copy of that famous writing.

In comparison

we have found over five thousand early copies of the New Testament.

When compared to each other

they are amazingly accurate.

This is important to understand,

the Bible as being trustworthy.

These manuscripts of the New Testament date back to

before the close of the first century

this means that there were still lots of people around who had witnessed what was written in the text.

Had there been any inaccuracy to the accounts there would have been plenty of people around to contest the writing.

Plainly put, the authors of those books knew that if what they wrote was found to be inaccurate

there would have been plenty of people to point it out.

(If you are at all interested in learning more about this please follow the link http://carm.org/manuscript-evidence )

This all said… I realize that some people just wont open their eyes…

there hearts have grown dull

and they can not be convinced that maybe God exists

and He is who He says He is.

For you,

my staunchest critic

and being thus, always having an argument against everything I  write or say…

what can you say to the transformed life?

I was a drunk,

literally beer for breakfast kind of girl.

I needed alcohol to function!

When I gave my heart to God he delivered me from alcoholism.

It happened almost overnight.

I did not suffer withdrawal.

I was steeped in witchcraft,

having been caught up in what can sometimes be

very beautiful aspects of the craft,

I wanted to die…

and whenever I cast

it always seemed to go badly.

When I gave my life to God my eyes were opened.

I saw that while “white witches” think they are “good

the spirits they commune with are the epitome of evil.

They work with Satan

and he can appear as something so beautiful,

his native language,

lies

and so that is why he and his can so easily convince a person that what they are doing is right….

he is out to kill, steal, and destroy

by any means necessary.

It’s war!

When I gave my life to God,

he dispelled the spells

and set this captive free!

The depression lifted

and for the first time in a long time I felt I was loved

and had a purpose!

Can’t you see yet?

I could have no more saved myself from alcoholism, and witchcraft, then a baby newly born could get up and run.

Ridiculous!

I could not have,

by my own power

forgiven the man who abused me horribly when I was just a child

and tried to kill my mother.

But the power of Christ in me, filled my heart with love for the man who was to be my father

I honor him to this day as such.

My mother, having come through addictions

heroin, meth, marijuana, prescription pills, and abusive men

has lost all her teeth,

but found the King!

Though separated from my “Dad”

she prays daily for restoration…

foolishness indeed to those who do not know the power of

 “God the great Physician”

He longs to heal and restore those who are broken or lost.

I speak of incredible things,

things you cannot fathom because you are so consumed with the meager lies you have been fed.

I have known so many like you.

To smart for your own good.

Even now you are preparing your rebuttal,

you open your mouth…

your sound bytes echo,

your pride swells stroking the inner man.

Convinced as you are that there is no grand maker,

no master plan.

My heart weeps for you

You wont give God anywhere to come in

but without Him you are dangerously empty,

Full of the other things you have pushed in

trying to fill the God shaped void

Never the less I try to make you stop, look and listen!

Creation renders man without excuse

and for lovers of truth, Amen!

I will never give up on you!

Clearly God has put you in my life for a reason.

You have such a hunger for truth.

Maybe in time God will reveal Himself to you

and you will use that amazing mind of yours to reach the lost for God.

That would be so AWESOME!!!

The very idea of you saved,

fills me with such joy

and I need some joy after this conversation.

I can have hope that one day you will see.

I must be faithful to never quite trying…

not to convert you,

I don’t want to push,

but to gently speak truth to you.

To show you with my faithful love and friendship that I am different than your other friends.

Because of Christ in me,

I can radiate a peace.

Because of Christ in me

I have joy.

Because of Christ in me

I want to live,

and if nothing else can convince you…this one truth should make a difference.

God has given me life!

Goodbye my dear friend for now,

yes I will see you soon.

Thanks for always putting up with me…

I know I can be trying sometimes

but you must know how genuinely I care.

Okay,

next time we meet lets just play chess,

I won’t bring Him up if you don’t!

Bye,

I love you. 

(Preach the gospel always, if necessary use words.)

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This has been hard. 

I don’t normally cry. 

I know who can help you, but you wont give Him a try. 

You ask what to do.

You ask what it means. 

But when I try and show you, you just get so mean.

Why even bother, you won’t like my response and yet you still test me with such hate in your heart.

I try to remember that your just lashing out, somehow you feel like God let you down. 

Man is not God though, we always fail. 

Please don’t use us as an excuse not to believe…God is bigger that that, just look and you’ll see. 

While some people do cruel things in the name of my King, God gave His life so that you could be free. 

Let Him call you redeemed. 

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Wow! That was hard! Planning a zero dollar budget is a real challenge, I bet sticking to it will be even harder though. Thank God I don’t have to do it without Him!

That’s right! It’s week three of the Financial Peace University class I am attending! This week we are told that we need to sit down and spend every dollar on paper, every single one. I opted to do a bi-monthly budget as we don’t get paid a set amount these days, the money flow is a bit irregular. This will mean that I will have to sit down and do a budget twice a month instead of just once, I don’t know which way is easier but I suppose this way will have to do for now. In any case I am really so excite about this class because I like so many other people had almost zero training in how to stay out of debt or live on a budget, I really needed someone wise and God centered to teach me about my finances, and what to do with them. Now thanks to FPU I finally feel like I am making some progress, thanks Dave! I can’t tell you how excited I am about this whole program! I know that my husband and I are doing exactly what we should be and I can’t wait to see the results and be able to “give like know one else later” !!!!

That is what this is really all about for me. I mean aside from just being wise and being able to retire and leave an inheritance for our grandchildren we want to be able to give more extravagantly then ever before! Yeah!!! So exciting!

I feel like I am getting a bit of a late start though as I am already in my early 30’s and so that is a bit discouraging but what can you do? I can’t change the past, but I commit to living like know one else now so that I can live and GIVE like know one else later!

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Lyric 1: When you feel alone and lonely, when you are feeling down, I know the person you can go to, He will turn your frown upside down.

Lyric 2: When the worlds closing in and all around seems dark, I know the one who will show you how to kindle an unquenchable spark.

Lyric 3: When you think that nothing matters and you’ve lost your greatest friend, come along and He will show you a joy that never ends.

Lyric 4: When you are so tired and you feel like giving up, just relax and let God hold you, don’t ever pick the burden back up!

Chorus: God’s yolk is easy. His burden is light. Let Him fill you with the brightest of lights. Don’t be afraid now, no don’t run away, just stop and pray now, He will show you the way! Oh!! Just stop and pray now, He will show you the way!

 

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I never promised you anything…not even a single thing, so hopefully you won’t be disappointed.

I am going to do something either very brave or very stupid and “come out” of the proverbial closet…not the “I’m gay” one but the other closet that everyone has at least one dark secret in. I am going to tell you that *hold’s breath* I….well, I am a Christian. There I said it! I don’t know why I have been tip toeing around this except for the fact that being a Christian these days is so very unpopular, and often I find that when I let people know what my faith is they tend to just sort of role there eyes and say “oohh she’s one of those”. I always think yep, yep I am one of those people who will love you no matter what, always speak truth in love, never “bible bang you” and try my very best to share the reason for my hope in Jesus to anyone who will listen. They don’t mean it like that though…they mean one of those “say your a Christian types” who only “say” and never “do”. They automatically toss me into the category of hypocrites, hatemongers, and judgmental fakers, which sadly many people who claim to be Christians are today, but that does not mean that I am and really by just assuming the worst it does us both such a huge disservice.

How can I show you that I am the real deal if you have already drawn your own conclusion about me?

How can I become a friend if you have already decided that I am most likely the type that does not “play well with others”?

I tell you now this simply will not do! You must give me the benefit of at least checking me out! I make a really good friend, or at least I try my very best and what more can be said in that regard? I am so, so, so sorry if you have been hurt or driven away from ever wanting anything to do with God or any of the quote “Christians” who follow Him because of something bad that happened to you, or some disservice done to you, or any other multitude of terrible possibilities. I apologize on behalf of the entire Christian faith and ask, oh please may I have a clean slate!?!

Thanks a heap! Your the best! Now I am sure to be put to the test…here’s to hoping I don’t disappoint, but oh blast, I am just a human and a Christian at that. 

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